Chapter 072 – Portable Wash Toilet
We are going to the forest called Green Howden where the giant scorpions, the enemy we have to defeat, lives.
A one way trip from High elf kingdom, Enol to Green Howden would take about 7 days.
Early morning on the first day, after we departed from Enol.
“Uuurgh~”
Lyss got carsick and became all groggy.
Normally if she had to travel, she would do so in high class carriage with cushions, and on paved roads. So this is the first time she had travelled long distance on dirt roads like this. She sat hugging her knees like in gym class, blue faced and had a handkerchief against her mouth.
By the way due to her sitting while hugging her legs, when the wagon swayed, her voluptuous chest gets squashed softly by her legs, causing them to change shape. A truly marvelous sight.
Snow and Chrisse, who were already used to it, played with the reversi I bought in Enol. Shia was on the coachman seat, and I was on lookout duty at the back.
“Lyss-sama, are you okay ?”
“Ye, yes, I’m fine, Shia, uuurgh…”
Shia was worried so she voiced her concern from the coachman seat.
Lyss replied that she’s okay, but clearly her face’s color is saying otherwise.
I’m also worrying about her so I gave some advice.
“Lyss-sama, if it is that unpleasant, I heard that looking far away can help relieving the symptom a bit.”
“Is it true ? Then I will believe hero-sama’s words……”
It’s just folk remedy, but it was better than doing nothing.
After that, Shia cheered her up in a weird way like ‘nobody has died because of car sickness anyways.’
For now, the first day ended without us getting attacked by monsters, so we reached the camping ground as planned.
We started preparing camp before the sun goes down.
I asked Lyss to take out the necessary things.
She held her hand out and called out their names, they then appeared.
Snow was preparing food.
Chrisse was taking care of the horses.
Shia was setting up a barrier surrounding this area.
Inevitably, the duty of gathering firewood fell on me and Lyss.
“Well then, let’s go gather firewood together”
“Firewood gathering, is it? Please leave it to me!”
Just in case, I took an AK-47 and hung it on my shoulder, then called out to Lyss.
But somehow she is strangely motivated, and pulled out the rapier which was hanging on her hips.
“Er… Lyss-sama, what exactly are planning to do ?”
“What, aren’t we going to gather firewood ? Ah, it’s all right. This rapier isn’t of normal metal, it’s made from the rare metal, orichalcum, that’s why it absolutely won’t break. Furthermore it’s extraordinarily magic conductive, so I can easily pierce and break a tree trunk at this level.”
(There is something like orichalcum !?)
Without minding the me who was shocked by the existence of orichalcum, with a joyful expression, Lyss was about to chop down a tree the size of a grown man.
I hugged my head at her ignorance of the ways of the world.
What kind of airhead is she!?
“No, living trees have water in it so you can’t use it as firewood. So you don’t have to cut it down”
“Is, is that so ? I’m sorry, I’m such a baka……”
Lyss realized her ignorance and put away the rapier with a beet red face.
Good thing it ended without her cutting down an innocent tree.
“Well then let’s gather withered branches that had fallen around this area, shall we ?”
“Ye, yes. I’ve troubled you”
Lyss dropped her shoulders a bit and starts collecting the withered branches like me.
Then came dinner.
The sun has gone down. We put a table and chairs next to the bonfire and made a roof with cloth. On the table there are stew and bread, simple side dishes, and a lamp shining with magic.
These furnitures and the like were all brought by Lyss.
During the level up quest last time, we camped for many days, but we didn’t bring many tools like this.
It was almost like a camp I sometimes saw on the TV in the previous world.
While we are drinking scented tea after the meal, I noticed the unusual sight of Lyss, who is sitting upright.
She held her abdomen, squirming and rubbing her thighs together.
“?”
As I tilted my head and wonder, Lyss softly whispered to Shia’s ear.
Shia whispered back.
“D, do it outside !?”
That attracted even Snow and Chrisse’ attention, Lyss’ face got dyed beet red and she looked downward.
I asked in place of everyone.
“What’s wrong ?”
“N, no, it’s just, er……”
Lyss is hesitating to say something…… ding, I got a revelation.
“Lyss-sama, I have something I want to take out.”
“Ye, yes. What should I take out ?”
“It’s the tall rectangle box. Please place it a little away from the camp, around here.”
“Here, right ? I got it.”
I stood up from the table, and asked her to place the rectangle box next to the carriage.
Lyss took the box out from the other dimension and placed it as she was told.
“Errr… what exactly is this……”
Lyss who took it out got curious and asked.
I, who was waiting for this question, puffed up my chest and answered.
“This, is the Portable Wash Toilet !”
The portable wash toilet in the previous world was just a metal water flask with nozzle attached. But the one I developed is closer to the simple toilet on construction site or event .
Four sides are covered with metal sheets made from magic liquid metal, a spare wash toilet was installed. On the floor there’s a tank to collect the filth, when it was full there’s a mechanism to throw the content outside. There was a lamp that ran on magic installed on the ceiling so that it could be used even if it was dark.
As I thought, the toilet must be enclosed with walls all around, you must cut off from the outside world. Right, you can even say that toilet is the final solace of a modern person.
After I heard that Lyss can store anything no matter the weight, I immediately constructed one.
Because I don’t want to live a life without wash toilet again.
While puffing up my chest, I encouraged Lyss.
“Right after you enter, there’s a switch for the light on your right. There’s a board inside with instruction on how to use the toilet written on it, please operate according to that”
“Operate the toilet ?”
Lyss didn’t understand and tilted her head in puzzlement.
I told her ‘ You will understand if you get in ’ and overbearingly pushed her into the outdoor wash toilet.
After a while, her voice came from inside the outdoor wash toilet — ‘ Hya!?’ ‘Unn!!!’ ‘As the 2nd princess of High elf kingdom, Enol, Lyss Enol Meméa, losing to something of this level is … nnn! ’
A little more time passed, the outdoor wash toilet’s door opens.
After she came out of the toilet, maybe her hips have given out, she sits right down and there.
Looks like the stimuli from the wash toilet was too strong for someone sensitive like her.
“Hi, hime-sama!”
Shia ran over in a panic and lended her hand to Lyss.
Lyss’ cheeks are dyed red, her eyes are cloudy, and she mumbles.
“I, I didn’t win against the wash toilet. I can’t live without the wash toilet anymore……”
Alright ! Another wash toilet believer GET !
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( ̄^ ̄)ゞ
Thanks for the new chapter! Also hooray to a new member of the wash toilet cult!
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Thanks for the chapter. Wash Toilet Harem keep on growing(LOL).
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And now I’m not so sure who is MC of this story. And even more: Lute is wash toilet’s b*ch – decided fact…
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I wonder when our MC would have children with his heroines…
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He is only 14 yrs old at the time mate….
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in their world 15 is being adult and they ARE married so…they can have kids as soon as they want to, they just have to “forget” to use the special contraception potion
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They are avoiding get children, if you remember his dream is help people, bisides rise a family cost money and just now he is starting to get his own fortune. If they get family they will need stop going on missions for a few months.
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Probably longer
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thanks for the update and keep up the good work
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Praise the wash toilet.
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…
Wash Toilet Cult on the making ?
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Thank u always for ur great work…
^^…
Muahahahahaha, another lamb has lost to our believe…
XD…
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Have faith in the wash toilet, gain eternal life!
When the wash toilet appears, who dares to cause strife?
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One night, later on…
“You know, my princess, if a wash toilet was able to stimulate that part of you so greatly… I have something else I can stimulate that part with… heh-heh-heh-heh…”
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New legend of the high elf born,
“If you use this wash toilet, increase your life by 100 days” – MC
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the power’s of the wash toilet is no lapping mater and if you add toilet paper with it…..my god……… the wash toilet will rule the world with a watery fist.
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Thanks for the Chapter!
keep it going,I like this Story.
Horaayyy for the Wash Toilet to rule the world! x’D
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Hue hue hue, welcome girly to the toilet cult, and on the right we have the grass porridge cult, on the left we have the believers of light
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Hello, I am one if the many who had joined the Grass Porridge Cult. If you want to join this cult, remember to worship the all-powerful Weed-nim.
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When the next chapter coming out? Waiting for it drivin’ me nuts.
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Thanks for the chapter.
Wash toilet can defeat high elf then next is demon I guess.
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Too awesome
Most plox
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oh deer i kind of cheat and use google translate on the raw of this novel and well.. wash toilet is geting a improvement.
IT EVOLVING!!!!
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You used…google translate?! ARE. YOU. SHITTING. ME?! Google translate is like farthest from an accurate translation. My credibility of this group has dropped. No wonder all the random Japanese words (that should have been translated) were left untranslated.
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Thank you.
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the f’ing guy and his damn wash toilets!!! Its his freaking fetish. also +1 for the “holding head” link, hes on a wash toilet OTZ
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Wash toilet-kun got another harem member! XD
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oh? you cant burn living trees? you never heard of forest fires?
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Usually forest fires only happen if it’s the dry season or triggered by the undergrowth being set alight.
Technically, you can use ‘living’ wood for campfires, but survivalists will always prefer dry, rotting, fallen forest material, with some bark scrapings as the moisture in cut material tends to get in the way of ignition.
It’s just a lot easier to use dry stuff as tinder.
It’s all to do with the amount of energy you put into getting a fire going, compared to what you get out.
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Thanks for doing this chapter😄
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Why oh why…. I suddenly have an idea for another product that Lute could construct with Meiya’s help…
The campground firewood dispenser.
Constructed in such a way that you cut the wood, insert it and already dried and usable (non-green) firewood comes out.
Cost to operate?
1 copper
1 or more logs of fresh firewood
Minor magic stone recharge.
Outputs equal firewood to what’s inserted.
Hire as a quest from local adventurers union to empty the coin every x number of days.
Lol.
I can just picture it as Lute travels he puts one in every camp area…
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The temptation is just too strong, mate.
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As an Otaku I find it super cringe-worthy when you translate it “I’m a baka”. That sounds horrible. Just translate it normal as “I’m an idiot”. It’s not cute, and it sounds so weaboo to say “I’m a baka”.
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Grammar also sucks. Fix broken sentences.
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Wash toilet cult:
+3 tolerance of true faith
-1 tolerance of heathens
-3 tolerance of heretics
+20% morale of army
+20% morale of navy
-1 attrition
-1 monthly war exhaustion
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